Why our house might not sell

If you have never tried to sell a home in a down market with two kids, two full time traveling jobs, a dog and cat, then this won't make a bit of sense to you.

Unfortunately, that is our reality.

The last showing was the day before Thanksgiving which to me was just plain mean. Aren't those people at the grocery store like everyone else? Is this a test? Sometimes I feel like God taps an angel on the shoulder and says, "Today we test Rebecca to see if she's ever going to learn anything about patience and grace under pressure." Give her a house showing while she's up to her elbows in pie dough and both kids are home from school. Let's see what's she got for us today.

So, the call came a day early that we have a showing tomorrow. That's a huge amount of notice from what we normally get. AND, you don't sell if you don't show so stop bitching and clean the house. I started the normal moving, shuffling, tidying. Somehow every showing requires a trip to Target, Lowes or WalMart for some new idea that I'm sure is the staging secret. This time it was Lowes for small evergreen trees to go into the pots on porch where the dead mums now reside.

I say to the kids, we have a showing tomorrow. Which is code for "you get even one Barbie out or think about playing with those Bionicles and you die." Sadly, they know the code. They are gracious and cooperative.

We also have a blanket of freshly fallen snow that looks beautiful and also covers the pile of leaves and two rakes that are still in the back yard. If it warms anymore before 12:45pm, we're busted.

Last night the boy goes to the neighbors house to play. We quickly instruct him to walk out the front door, down the driveway, down the street, into the cul de sac to the neighbor's house that lives directly behind us. Why you might ask.

So you don't mess up the snow silly!

We've got a house to sell and we're not messing around. At 10pm the boy comes home full of stories of video games and pizza at the neighbors. Very suburbian and all. What does his psycho crazed mom say to him after looking out the backdoor, "You walked through the snow!!!!!!!!!!!!" The boy looks at me and says very sweetly and apologetically, "I'm really sorry Mom, it was just too creepy to walk around the block this late."

Remember our motto, Therapy Fund, not College Fund.

This picture illustrates why our house might not sell today.